Who would have thought that I'd would be writing about two men who changed my life through our meeting here on twitter. Two men who have brought the best of me out when I at the time thought my life had reached a hooohummm level. Two men who I adored and would share a laugh lasting for days ahead and beyound, yep my daddyB and daddyUP.
Just after Christmas, DaddyB told me he was divorcing DaddyUp and giving DaddyUp full custody of me. At first, I thought it was a mean joke but alas, quickly calling up DaddyUP, I sadly found out it was all too true. I was stunned! I knew that DaddyUp would be heartbroken and there is nothing I wouldn't do to help him or bring comfort to him, or take the pain, whatever it took to keep him less hurting. DaddyUp was devastated. It was so swift, like DaddyB took a razor sharp knife and cut DaddyUp ' heart out without even a whimper of sadness. So cold! So mean! So hardened! No words of remorse, sadness of any sort, no words anything to hang onto! Just off and away!
DaddyB on the other hand, was cool and aloof about it. He told me as if he hadnt a care in the world and his decision was one that we should just accept and carry on about our lives. He told me daddyup would be fine in time and would forget him as time goes by.....I wanted to get on a plane and smacked the fuck out of him right then and there. How dare he!!!!
For countless days and nights we (daddyup) combed through different emotions, asking our closest of friends had they heard about what was going on and if they knew anything different than what we knew but all were clueless. Looking back at all of it, strikes an odd smile, that while we were looking for answers, making sure that daddyb was ok, in his right mind, or holding back something dreadful, daddyb was just aloof to it all. He never lost his composure, never gave it a second thought. Simply telling us to move on, things will get better. It didn't affect me as much as it did daddyup for they were partners and I was just the "squirt", However, if you value friendship as I do, hearing the words, "move on things will get better" is so cold, cruel, empty.
This part is for you daddyb:
If you perchance read this or take the time to read it, I want you to know that I am not angry with you and probably never had a reason to be personally angry with you but I was at the time fucking pissed off as you are or at least I knew it to be, a "man of honor, integrity, respect" Compassion for your fellow men. You appeared to have tossed it all away when it came to dealing with daddyup. Perhaps, you didn't self evaluate your own worth to daddyup, perhaps you felt you were just anther man with nothing special going on in your life so you acted accordingly as many men do when it comes down to breaking up a relationship. Was daddyup a "fling"? Two effin years and it ends up with ..."sorry mate" it just doesn't work for me??? Where the fuck was your integrity, compassion, loyalty, respect and your word of honor at during this time???
Yeah you probably knew daddyup would cry a bit....but let me tell you dude....he cried until there were no more tears to be shed, he cried like he lost his best friend, he cried like there was no tomorrow and I virtually held him when it should have been you....you should have held him and told him it was over....you should have allowed him the dignity of losing you, holding you, loving, hating and getting that final good bye out but you were a coward and you couldn't deal with it. You ran away. You offered no closure. You don't sound like the guy I called "daddyb".....
"Daddyb" The part of you that I choose to remember for a life time:
....in my darest hour back in Christmas 2009, you came into my life on twitter and the void I was missing seemed to have disappear. I met a nice guy who lifted me up in mind and spirit. I was dealing with my first xmas alone with my entire family gone, an orphan. You allowed me to be a kid again, one more time to feel something alive in me. Nothing dirty, nothing about sex,,,just about a kid with his "pop and doggie". Some would shudder at the thought of it all but you and I gave it a life of its own and we didnt stop being friends we wrote to each other, exchanged trinkets. Then the joy of your life entered....Daddyup....and the bond grew stronger. Many a laugh we shared.
I guess when you broke up with daddyup you had to disown me as well. I thought it was cute in a way and I knew it had to be. We both knew that I would always love you both but choose daddyup over you. Why? your life was busy, you had a busines to run and we were on different time zones so when I was on here at night you were working so I got to hang with daddyup more. He always made me laugh, he still does.
So farewell daddyb, I wish you well. I often wonder if you miss daddyup or even cared. But that's not an issue anymore as Daddyup is growing by leaps and bounds and yes, I am sure he still misses you in ways only he would understand but not to sound mean, he doesn't need you anymore. He found his self esteem again and he makes me more and more proud to be his friend and now his "sunshine".
For Daddyup
Everytime I write to you on twitter or on regular mail, skype, other communications, I continue to call you daddyup but I think we need to end that name as it continues to remind us both of the past and who really needs to think of a bad time of life. So.....since Im still the "kid" known as "sunshine" I have decided to rename you "Papa". or you can change the spelling of it...but no matter what you are still da poppy. and no we are NOT using Pop...unless we call you "Popup" :) Let me know.
Truth be known, I am older than "Papa" @uptheshitter but since I am NOT OLD enough to be his real daddy....I get to be "the kid" and will remain that way, until its time. I have had a lot of fun being the kid at times on here with my family unit....esp with unk rog @brazilliantop ...I know this is the wrong spelling and will edit it later but I want him to know that he is still our family even though the other man is gone....what was his name?
Papa is moving on with his life now and I am hoping to catch up with him in September 2012 when i visit for two weeks in the UK. I have never driven a car with the steering wheel on the left hand side of the car this should be interesting and those "roundabouts" scare the fuck out of me but I will learn it ...come hell or high water as I want to pick Papa ..up for a ride of his life!!!
Peace
TJ
Sunday, July 8, 2012
Saturday, January 22, 2011
"More Random Thoughts"
A few nights ago, I was on twitter because I was restless and couldn't fall asleep. This time on twitter it was the early morning perhaps around two am and this guy was talking to his buddy about this hot guy he saw in the mall and he managed the "courage" to go up to him and start a conversation. They chatted for several moments and then exchanged phone numbers. I smiled when I read it as I felt good about what and how he was so excited about the encounter.
I normally would have shouted "atta boy" to him but for some reason I decided not to chat on twitter as I didn't really know anybody but just laid back and listened to all the peeps tweeting. Anyway, I continue to listen to this guy thinking "how cool he was" but then he took me by complete surprise and told his buddy that he met with the guy and decided he wanted no part of him because he found out that he was HIV POZ and that turned him off!!!! The guy made me even more pissed when he said, " I felt dirty to be around him"! I was so fucking angry at his statement that I wanted to "beat his ass" but luckily I held my tongue. It was none of my business and no matter how angry it made me to hear these words, "it still was none of my business to interfere"!
It took several weeks for me to get over it. Am I too sensitive? Perhaps! Years ago, I was going to school to become a nurse and while I was in school, I took a job as a CNA/HHA to make ends meet. I took on care giving with HIV patients as I thought at the time this would be a great way to "give back to the community" and at the same time, take on something really hard to get my feet wet, per se in a nursing setting.
It had to be the hardest job I ever had, as this was the "before combo-cocktails" medication and the men and women were dying everyday. It was devastating to see so many good men and women, die before their time, before they even had a chance to make their "mark on life". Many a sad day was had and when they did pass away, for some unknown reason, it was always on my shift. It was an honor to be with them but at the same time, a big loss. In time, I dropped out of nursing school as I just couldn't handle "micro-biology" and went into another venue of health care.
It seems unreal that there are so many men out there who are still completely ignorant of HIV and the "real truths" about it. You couldn't then and you still can't today, catch the virus by speaking, holding hands, touching or for that matter, kissing a hiv positive person. Some will argue about "kissing" kicking in some nonsense about mouth sores or fungus of sorts but in reality this too is too hyped up for it to be even out there. I'm not going to dwell on that fact as it is rare and lets be honest with each other, on your first date or meeting, (unless its a one nite stand" per se, you won't be having your tongue down his/her throat like there is no tomorrow unless this is your most gifted talent :) then I'd beware.
The point of what I was trying to make, just because a man or woman is HIV POZ it does NOT mean NOR should it be in the same sentence that "he or she is dirty". I resent hearing it and would appreciate you reading up on the subject matter before you throw the "hate word" out there.
Those who prefer to have "unprotected sex" know the risks and it is NOT something to look down on for those who choose it. If, my best friend told me he was having unprotected sex, I would probably read him the riot act and want to slap him up and down but he would always be my best friend even if he contracted the Virus. I wouldn't turn away but I am sure I'd be kicking his ass "virtually" in my mind. Once a friend of mine, always a friend. And yes, if he got sick, I'd be there holding his hand, and not saying anything more than I love you buddy!
Stating in your profile that you are "HIV Negative" is still a good thing but please refrain from saying "dirty" or even "STD Free" these are unnecessary words. Always be upfront with each other, it's only fair. I don't think it is necessary to even utter the words, "POZ FRIENDLY" you make it sound like you are giving a gift or going out of you way. Life is short, we all are aware that this is it, so live it fully, live it honestly, and you'd be surprised finding out what a better man or woman you are by just being yourself.
Peace!
I normally would have shouted "atta boy" to him but for some reason I decided not to chat on twitter as I didn't really know anybody but just laid back and listened to all the peeps tweeting. Anyway, I continue to listen to this guy thinking "how cool he was" but then he took me by complete surprise and told his buddy that he met with the guy and decided he wanted no part of him because he found out that he was HIV POZ and that turned him off!!!! The guy made me even more pissed when he said, " I felt dirty to be around him"! I was so fucking angry at his statement that I wanted to "beat his ass" but luckily I held my tongue. It was none of my business and no matter how angry it made me to hear these words, "it still was none of my business to interfere"!
It took several weeks for me to get over it. Am I too sensitive? Perhaps! Years ago, I was going to school to become a nurse and while I was in school, I took a job as a CNA/HHA to make ends meet. I took on care giving with HIV patients as I thought at the time this would be a great way to "give back to the community" and at the same time, take on something really hard to get my feet wet, per se in a nursing setting.
It had to be the hardest job I ever had, as this was the "before combo-cocktails" medication and the men and women were dying everyday. It was devastating to see so many good men and women, die before their time, before they even had a chance to make their "mark on life". Many a sad day was had and when they did pass away, for some unknown reason, it was always on my shift. It was an honor to be with them but at the same time, a big loss. In time, I dropped out of nursing school as I just couldn't handle "micro-biology" and went into another venue of health care.
It seems unreal that there are so many men out there who are still completely ignorant of HIV and the "real truths" about it. You couldn't then and you still can't today, catch the virus by speaking, holding hands, touching or for that matter, kissing a hiv positive person. Some will argue about "kissing" kicking in some nonsense about mouth sores or fungus of sorts but in reality this too is too hyped up for it to be even out there. I'm not going to dwell on that fact as it is rare and lets be honest with each other, on your first date or meeting, (unless its a one nite stand" per se, you won't be having your tongue down his/her throat like there is no tomorrow unless this is your most gifted talent :) then I'd beware.
The point of what I was trying to make, just because a man or woman is HIV POZ it does NOT mean NOR should it be in the same sentence that "he or she is dirty". I resent hearing it and would appreciate you reading up on the subject matter before you throw the "hate word" out there.
Those who prefer to have "unprotected sex" know the risks and it is NOT something to look down on for those who choose it. If, my best friend told me he was having unprotected sex, I would probably read him the riot act and want to slap him up and down but he would always be my best friend even if he contracted the Virus. I wouldn't turn away but I am sure I'd be kicking his ass "virtually" in my mind. Once a friend of mine, always a friend. And yes, if he got sick, I'd be there holding his hand, and not saying anything more than I love you buddy!
Stating in your profile that you are "HIV Negative" is still a good thing but please refrain from saying "dirty" or even "STD Free" these are unnecessary words. Always be upfront with each other, it's only fair. I don't think it is necessary to even utter the words, "POZ FRIENDLY" you make it sound like you are giving a gift or going out of you way. Life is short, we all are aware that this is it, so live it fully, live it honestly, and you'd be surprised finding out what a better man or woman you are by just being yourself.
Peace!
Thursday, December 30, 2010
"About those Daddies of Mine" & Random Thoughts
Though its not "father's day", the subject of my daddies on Twitter has raised a few questions and a few nasty comments but all in all, the men on twitter take it with a grain of salt, per se!
Daddy "B" ( Isurfnaked) and Daddy "UP" (uptheshitter) are two of three closest friends I have in real life. My daddies and I have so much fun on twitter and come up with the zanniest things but if you read the content of what is being said, you would get a real sense of how loving both of these men are and how they in real life could actually raise a child. They have patience and love is abundant.
In life outside of twitter, I skype with them and the three of us exchange real letters...yep the postman can testify it. So, on twitter it's a combination of real life and fun life.
Then drama sets in! Some men don't like it, they think it's childish not becoming of grown men.....to them, we say, "get a effin grip". Our conversations may not speak of "manly words" but if you ever wanted to just let your hair down and have fun, then just settle back and take it all in. It cost nothing to laugh but a hefty price to hate something you don't understand. "HATE" is an ugly word but unfortunately it is out there. We as a family unit want no part of it. So, if this is all that you have to offer, then move on!
My daddies have a serious side. They are in their own right, gifted and experienced MEN and they are truly the men to turn to if you have a problem that you cant handle. They may not have the answers you are seeking but you can take this to the bank....they will help you to whatever extent that they can and will even go out of their way, to find a solution for you.
My Uncles and Aunts:
Within our family unit, my daddies have curtailed my uncle and aunt list cause they told me the family tree was getting too full so I was allowed to keep a few uncles and the rest are now "sand box playmates". The few uncles that still remain are:
@braziltalltop Unk Rog :) sweet man takes me to the beaches in our matching "speedos" and he helps me build "man-castles" made of sand.
@chadsf Unk Chad is a sweet loving man who travels the world and sends virtual post cards to me....he claims they are real post cards that got lost in the mail but daddyup @uptheshitter told me that it must be true cause unk chad never lies.....hmmm I think he fibs but im just guessing :)
Uncle Roy and Uncle Steve dey be partners and loving uncles..they are allowed to babysit me when my daddies go out of town too suddenly. They gave me a lil cuz a few months ago....he is super bad boy Seth.
@FrankrOd....he is da uncle who sticks with me no matter what and he knows lots of men...LOTS of dem
Random Thoughts:
Most of the men I have met on Twitter are fun guys and make me smile alot. Most of them have one thing in common, they are "gifted" in their own right on a variety of subjects and I truly believe if all these men got together in one big room and started shaing ideas, this world we live in would be a happier and more productive place to live.
Porno Stars on Twitter:
If you can get your mind and body out of the gutter when watching or just looking at their hot lil pics ( aroooooooooooo) the men themselves are truly for the most part, gifted men as well. I follow a few of them and sometimes they post something or just a comment and I want to further the comment but I can't as they don't follow me. It's frustrating at times because a lot of times what they say, is so real I get frustrated that they can't hear me. Of course I get over it, they are private people too and there is no telling that what might leave my lips could be stupid, so I guess Im better off not commenting. :) but if any of them read this blog....I do admire you the person and not just the body or element that you portray.
Coaches/Mentors:
there are way too many men I have come to meet on here that offer a wide range of work out tips and display their results on twitter. The one thing they have in common....genuine real men with no attitude whatsoever. I can't for lack of not writing their full twitter names but I can name a few and you would have to guess who they pertain to:
Justin from New York...my main man i can turn to and ask anything about bodywork to anything....he is super nice and super genuine.
Rileyatex... he works out hard and his very modest about himself but super good guy.
Frankrod....a cool guy who always remembers to send me a laugh...and gifted in giving advice that enhances the soul and body.
Beachboynate....thats not his twitter name but I can't remember is :) he runs daily along the beaches and sometimes takes me for a virtual kite flying while we run the beach together
Athenspoz: another guy who works out hard and can prove it by that "red jockstrap" that is his trademark on Twitter
JockPoz: I know this name is wrong....but its close. If you ever doubted yourself and your goals...hit this guy up....he will share his outlook on life and the positive side of attaining anything you want in life. Super nice and handsome young man.
Any and all of these names will help you achieve your goals:
Nate, Sicillian, Paul, Adam, Wally, Tristian, Uncle D, MCM, Kurt, Ptay, Will, Xavier,montrose, my two daddies uptheshitter and ivantheterror, some private ones but they have to remain private but they are out there all over so if you someone that talks or rants about bodybuilding mind or body...hit up a "hey there" and I am sure that they will respond.
FFF:
I don't always make my list of FF on time. Hell, I don't think I have ever been on time for it. But I can tell you this, I do appreciate all that send me one and try my best to shout out to you when I do mine. If, I don't mention you in my list and you did for me, then shout out and I will remember that way. Of course my FF are always different and yes, it's true, I use the "kid" inside of me to come up with a name for the list. However, one thing is certain any person that I shout out to follow, in my eyes are well worth following.
To all that I call "Friend", I wish you a Happy and Prosperous New Year!
Peace!
TJ aka @tjbadassupjr
PPS: I somehow lost contact with a guy named Julian...he is/was an artist if anyone knows the name, please hit me up and let me know if he is ok. He was one of the first few guys I met on twitter.
PPPS:
I miss Eric_Chambers. He left suddenly and though, many of his former twitter buddies are mad and or hurt by his sudden departure, I always knew he was going to leave and would do it just like he told me he would. Even, I was taken by surprise that he was gone, like a severed limb, left, whereabouts unknown. I wish well and think of him often but always with a smile as he was in fact a truly unique and gifted man.
Daddy "B" ( Isurfnaked) and Daddy "UP" (uptheshitter) are two of three closest friends I have in real life. My daddies and I have so much fun on twitter and come up with the zanniest things but if you read the content of what is being said, you would get a real sense of how loving both of these men are and how they in real life could actually raise a child. They have patience and love is abundant.
In life outside of twitter, I skype with them and the three of us exchange real letters...yep the postman can testify it. So, on twitter it's a combination of real life and fun life.
Then drama sets in! Some men don't like it, they think it's childish not becoming of grown men.....to them, we say, "get a effin grip". Our conversations may not speak of "manly words" but if you ever wanted to just let your hair down and have fun, then just settle back and take it all in. It cost nothing to laugh but a hefty price to hate something you don't understand. "HATE" is an ugly word but unfortunately it is out there. We as a family unit want no part of it. So, if this is all that you have to offer, then move on!
My daddies have a serious side. They are in their own right, gifted and experienced MEN and they are truly the men to turn to if you have a problem that you cant handle. They may not have the answers you are seeking but you can take this to the bank....they will help you to whatever extent that they can and will even go out of their way, to find a solution for you.
My Uncles and Aunts:
Within our family unit, my daddies have curtailed my uncle and aunt list cause they told me the family tree was getting too full so I was allowed to keep a few uncles and the rest are now "sand box playmates". The few uncles that still remain are:
@braziltalltop Unk Rog :) sweet man takes me to the beaches in our matching "speedos" and he helps me build "man-castles" made of sand.
@chadsf Unk Chad is a sweet loving man who travels the world and sends virtual post cards to me....he claims they are real post cards that got lost in the mail but daddyup @uptheshitter told me that it must be true cause unk chad never lies.....hmmm I think he fibs but im just guessing :)
Uncle Roy and Uncle Steve dey be partners and loving uncles..they are allowed to babysit me when my daddies go out of town too suddenly. They gave me a lil cuz a few months ago....he is super bad boy Seth.
@FrankrOd....he is da uncle who sticks with me no matter what and he knows lots of men...LOTS of dem
@slimdon he is my skool mate...he aint as smart as me but we tell him he is so he dont get angry :)
Random Thoughts:
Most of the men I have met on Twitter are fun guys and make me smile alot. Most of them have one thing in common, they are "gifted" in their own right on a variety of subjects and I truly believe if all these men got together in one big room and started shaing ideas, this world we live in would be a happier and more productive place to live.
Porno Stars on Twitter:
If you can get your mind and body out of the gutter when watching or just looking at their hot lil pics ( aroooooooooooo) the men themselves are truly for the most part, gifted men as well. I follow a few of them and sometimes they post something or just a comment and I want to further the comment but I can't as they don't follow me. It's frustrating at times because a lot of times what they say, is so real I get frustrated that they can't hear me. Of course I get over it, they are private people too and there is no telling that what might leave my lips could be stupid, so I guess Im better off not commenting. :) but if any of them read this blog....I do admire you the person and not just the body or element that you portray.
Coaches/Mentors:
there are way too many men I have come to meet on here that offer a wide range of work out tips and display their results on twitter. The one thing they have in common....genuine real men with no attitude whatsoever. I can't for lack of not writing their full twitter names but I can name a few and you would have to guess who they pertain to:
Justin from New York...my main man i can turn to and ask anything about bodywork to anything....he is super nice and super genuine.
Rileyatex... he works out hard and his very modest about himself but super good guy.
Frankrod....a cool guy who always remembers to send me a laugh...and gifted in giving advice that enhances the soul and body.
Beachboynate....thats not his twitter name but I can't remember is :) he runs daily along the beaches and sometimes takes me for a virtual kite flying while we run the beach together
Athenspoz: another guy who works out hard and can prove it by that "red jockstrap" that is his trademark on Twitter
JockPoz: I know this name is wrong....but its close. If you ever doubted yourself and your goals...hit this guy up....he will share his outlook on life and the positive side of attaining anything you want in life. Super nice and handsome young man.
Any and all of these names will help you achieve your goals:
Nate, Sicillian, Paul, Adam, Wally, Tristian, Uncle D, MCM, Kurt, Ptay, Will, Xavier,montrose, my two daddies uptheshitter and ivantheterror, some private ones but they have to remain private but they are out there all over so if you someone that talks or rants about bodybuilding mind or body...hit up a "hey there" and I am sure that they will respond.
FFF:
I don't always make my list of FF on time. Hell, I don't think I have ever been on time for it. But I can tell you this, I do appreciate all that send me one and try my best to shout out to you when I do mine. If, I don't mention you in my list and you did for me, then shout out and I will remember that way. Of course my FF are always different and yes, it's true, I use the "kid" inside of me to come up with a name for the list. However, one thing is certain any person that I shout out to follow, in my eyes are well worth following.
To all that I call "Friend", I wish you a Happy and Prosperous New Year!
Peace!
TJ aka @tjbadassupjr
PPS: I somehow lost contact with a guy named Julian...he is/was an artist if anyone knows the name, please hit me up and let me know if he is ok. He was one of the first few guys I met on twitter.
PPPS:
I miss Eric_Chambers. He left suddenly and though, many of his former twitter buddies are mad and or hurt by his sudden departure, I always knew he was going to leave and would do it just like he told me he would. Even, I was taken by surprise that he was gone, like a severed limb, left, whereabouts unknown. I wish well and think of him often but always with a smile as he was in fact a truly unique and gifted man.
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
"Thumbs Down!!!!" on Mr. Tweet!!!!
Last night (Aug 10,2009) I decided to use a twitter application that I truly thought was harmless and used it to "give recommendations" to many guys/gals that I felt deserved a "shout-out" as they have always been supportive and nice to me on "Twitter".
With my new job about to start next week and moving into a new apartment, I knew my time on "twitter" would be rare and thus, before departing from it, I would leave with some happy thoughts to the guys/gals that I follow or those who follow me.
"That Didn't Happen"!!!
Unbeknown to me, using the "Mr. Tweet" application created havoc amongst those who I recommended and actually pissed off others who didn't even get one. How do I know? well by the number of "DM" 'S that I received telling me to "shut it down". Instead of telling me what it was doing, they simply told me to cease for a variety of reasons none that I care to elaborate on as it bears no real meaning.
It took one phone call from a very close buddy who I did in fact recommend who was highly upset and without further "ado", I ceased sending the recommendations. I was still in the dark as to what havoc it had caused but would find out later from buddies who explained it the best they could and accepted my apology at face value.
Why did I use a twitter application and not just do a FF or SSS or Humpday follow? I wanted to add something about each person, more personal I guess but as it turned out...it backfired!!
So to all twitters that were on last night and got the "wrath of Mr. Tweet" through, my recommendations....I truly apologize for the inconvenience. It won't happen again as I REFUSE to use any applications on "twitter" !!!
With my new job about to start next week and moving into a new apartment, I knew my time on "twitter" would be rare and thus, before departing from it, I would leave with some happy thoughts to the guys/gals that I follow or those who follow me.
"That Didn't Happen"!!!
Unbeknown to me, using the "Mr. Tweet" application created havoc amongst those who I recommended and actually pissed off others who didn't even get one. How do I know? well by the number of "DM" 'S that I received telling me to "shut it down". Instead of telling me what it was doing, they simply told me to cease for a variety of reasons none that I care to elaborate on as it bears no real meaning.
It took one phone call from a very close buddy who I did in fact recommend who was highly upset and without further "ado", I ceased sending the recommendations. I was still in the dark as to what havoc it had caused but would find out later from buddies who explained it the best they could and accepted my apology at face value.
Why did I use a twitter application and not just do a FF or SSS or Humpday follow? I wanted to add something about each person, more personal I guess but as it turned out...it backfired!!
So to all twitters that were on last night and got the "wrath of Mr. Tweet" through, my recommendations....I truly apologize for the inconvenience. It won't happen again as I REFUSE to use any applications on "twitter" !!!
Monday, July 27, 2009
"New Changes As July Comes to An End"
For the last several months, I have been actively trying my best to change career paths and get out of being a professional "care-giver" and to my own astonishment, my goal has finally taken root. ☺ YAY!!! Starting in mid-August, I will be back in an office setting where I seem to be at my best. I am very excited and hope that I get to stay till it is time for me to retire!!!! It's a good job and allows me to do what I think is my "business forte" that being, providing customer service for our clients.
As many know, looking for a job in this day and age is no easy task. With our economy being what it is, "mister employer" is more selective than he has been in the past. In the last six months, I must have sent more than one thousand resumes out and at most, landed ten interviews? Of those ten interviews, perhaps, three of the interviews made any sense to the position that was being offered. I don't mean to offend any employer out there but where in the hell did you get your questions? I can understand some questions about "what if you had to fire someone....how would you go about it?....or "what if you saw someone stealing...would you report them and why??? but get real when you ask questions that are "so off the beaten path" that leaves the interviewiee with a "duh"....which I am sure I gave that answer or the look!! A word to those of you who are lucky enough to land an interview....go to google and read up on "interview questions"...you will laugh at some of them but I dare you NOT to dismiss them as they will be the questions they want to ask and want answers. Enough about that!
With a new job approaching, I started apartment hunting and this is a nightmare for TJ. Yes, I would rather get one that is small for just me but the prices are overwhelming me, so I'm looking at other alternatives. For the first year on the new job, I want to live close as TJ don't want to be late nor does TJ want to drive in the snow. Yeah, I know with "global warming" that even Philly's snow is no big deal to most...but TJ don't like how the other drivers ...drive in the snow. TJ drives slow in the snow and heavy rains....those other drivers....drive like they have a plane to catch or that their car's are racing cars and have to go maximu speed at all times. Tj tends to flip the bird a lot!!! ☺☺☺
Twitter has been lots of fun for me. I have met new twitters and laugh alot more this year than last. This is good! I tend to rant in the room about losing followers all the time but it's just in jest as I have way more than I know how to handle. Don't get me wrong, I like my followers but it's hard to say hello to each of them and isn't that what we are suppose to do? So, if, you are following me...give me a shout and let's exchange more chats.
TJ
As many know, looking for a job in this day and age is no easy task. With our economy being what it is, "mister employer" is more selective than he has been in the past. In the last six months, I must have sent more than one thousand resumes out and at most, landed ten interviews? Of those ten interviews, perhaps, three of the interviews made any sense to the position that was being offered. I don't mean to offend any employer out there but where in the hell did you get your questions? I can understand some questions about "what if you had to fire someone....how would you go about it?....or "what if you saw someone stealing...would you report them and why??? but get real when you ask questions that are "so off the beaten path" that leaves the interviewiee with a "duh"....which I am sure I gave that answer or the look!! A word to those of you who are lucky enough to land an interview....go to google and read up on "interview questions"...you will laugh at some of them but I dare you NOT to dismiss them as they will be the questions they want to ask and want answers. Enough about that!
With a new job approaching, I started apartment hunting and this is a nightmare for TJ. Yes, I would rather get one that is small for just me but the prices are overwhelming me, so I'm looking at other alternatives. For the first year on the new job, I want to live close as TJ don't want to be late nor does TJ want to drive in the snow. Yeah, I know with "global warming" that even Philly's snow is no big deal to most...but TJ don't like how the other drivers ...drive in the snow. TJ drives slow in the snow and heavy rains....those other drivers....drive like they have a plane to catch or that their car's are racing cars and have to go maximu speed at all times. Tj tends to flip the bird a lot!!! ☺☺☺
Twitter has been lots of fun for me. I have met new twitters and laugh alot more this year than last. This is good! I tend to rant in the room about losing followers all the time but it's just in jest as I have way more than I know how to handle. Don't get me wrong, I like my followers but it's hard to say hello to each of them and isn't that what we are suppose to do? So, if, you are following me...give me a shout and let's exchange more chats.
TJ
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Second Thoughts
I re-read my first post (Dreading May) and was going to delete it as it was very personal and perhaps a syndrome of "TMI" but decided to let it remain as is for now. If you ever find yourself in a similar situation and need help in deciding which path of care is right for you/your loved ones, just ask. I can't publish it here as I would be sued for my remarks. :)
You saw a fraction of my serious side and being "multi-faceted" there is a lot more to me and hopefully as time charges on you will pick it up without questioning my sanity. :) The one thing in life that I love to do is....laugh. I love a good smile on a man...well women too but being gay I sort of look at men more. :) If you read my profile on here, you would already know that I love to bike ride, work-out, skate, ( well I don't skate much anymore, I crashed into a tree and flipped over and somehow crushed my left elbow....where that tree came from I dont have a clue but it sure knew how to stop a skater, fast) I love the feeling after a sweaty work out..yeah not for everyone but there is a natural high that screams to your inner mind "atta-boy" you did good. Its harder for me to work out as the bum elbow doesn't move certain ways and lifting weights is out of the question but I can't let it stop me, so I work around it. For me, I have to get more disciplined to work out daily and with my current job, it's not always that simple but I'm gonna do it anyway. :)
As to my current job situation, it's just not for me. It is an honorable job/career for many who choose to remain in the field as it does have it's just rewards. However, I would rather be in a career where I still work with seniors but not in direct care. I am more into administrative/management and would like be a part of the solution in providing more health care options for all who need it.
TJ
You saw a fraction of my serious side and being "multi-faceted" there is a lot more to me and hopefully as time charges on you will pick it up without questioning my sanity. :) The one thing in life that I love to do is....laugh. I love a good smile on a man...well women too but being gay I sort of look at men more. :) If you read my profile on here, you would already know that I love to bike ride, work-out, skate, ( well I don't skate much anymore, I crashed into a tree and flipped over and somehow crushed my left elbow....where that tree came from I dont have a clue but it sure knew how to stop a skater, fast) I love the feeling after a sweaty work out..yeah not for everyone but there is a natural high that screams to your inner mind "atta-boy" you did good. Its harder for me to work out as the bum elbow doesn't move certain ways and lifting weights is out of the question but I can't let it stop me, so I work around it. For me, I have to get more disciplined to work out daily and with my current job, it's not always that simple but I'm gonna do it anyway. :)
As to my current job situation, it's just not for me. It is an honorable job/career for many who choose to remain in the field as it does have it's just rewards. However, I would rather be in a career where I still work with seniors but not in direct care. I am more into administrative/management and would like be a part of the solution in providing more health care options for all who need it.
TJ
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Dreading May
This is my first of many blogs that I hope to write and I implore the reader to think about it but don't dwell on it. We all have "events" in our lives that changes our lives, some events are good ones that make us more appreciative about our lives and we look forward in allowing these events to follow us into our future. Then there are "dark events". We all could live without these events but at the same time, we all know at some point of our lives, we have to face them. Yes, my dear friends, today I want to share the loss of my family. I am not writing this for your sympathy but rather, for your understanding of the guy you know as TJ.
I have been moody for the last few weeks and I know that most of it is because I finally have owned up to my problem but have no idea as of yet how to resolve it. I am professional care giver to the elderly, mostly for dementia patients. I have been doing it for the last six years and finally have to come to terms that I can't do it anymore. My problem is more complicated as most employers are being damn selective in who he/she hires and with today's economy rapidly in turmoil, getting another chance to re-kindle a new career path, looks grim. Yet, I still can't be a care giver anymore. I am on a case right now in Cape May, NJ and though many would love to be so near the shore line, ( I am 200 ft from the bay) my heart is not in the job anymore.
May is always a tough month for me and knowing it was coming up, I guess my mood started to change without giving it much thought until, someone in the Twitter chat room was talking about mother's day. It hit me like a ton of bricks and my mood started to darken.
My mom passed away in July of 2003, my brother in May of 2004 and my father in March of 2005 I took time off my career path and personally care gave for all three. Most of my brother's care was done in a hospital but I was with him almost everyday. I spent most of 2006 crying and getting the anger out of my system. I truly miss them a lot but by being the care giver for all three and being there for their darkest hours, I grew in other ways. Inever have to question myself on could's or should's as I know they had the best care.
May is hard not just because of Mother's day but because my brother was lain to rest on my mom's birthday, May 12th. June ain't much better, as it represents my fathers birthday, June 1 and my brother's birthday June 21 and Father's day lays somewhere in that month. So be forwarn that I may be moody in June as well but I will try my best to keep a better grip.
I have been moody for the last few weeks and I know that most of it is because I finally have owned up to my problem but have no idea as of yet how to resolve it. I am professional care giver to the elderly, mostly for dementia patients. I have been doing it for the last six years and finally have to come to terms that I can't do it anymore. My problem is more complicated as most employers are being damn selective in who he/she hires and with today's economy rapidly in turmoil, getting another chance to re-kindle a new career path, looks grim. Yet, I still can't be a care giver anymore. I am on a case right now in Cape May, NJ and though many would love to be so near the shore line, ( I am 200 ft from the bay) my heart is not in the job anymore.
May is always a tough month for me and knowing it was coming up, I guess my mood started to change without giving it much thought until, someone in the Twitter chat room was talking about mother's day. It hit me like a ton of bricks and my mood started to darken.
My mom passed away in July of 2003, my brother in May of 2004 and my father in March of 2005 I took time off my career path and personally care gave for all three. Most of my brother's care was done in a hospital but I was with him almost everyday. I spent most of 2006 crying and getting the anger out of my system. I truly miss them a lot but by being the care giver for all three and being there for their darkest hours, I grew in other ways. Inever have to question myself on could's or should's as I know they had the best care.
May is hard not just because of Mother's day but because my brother was lain to rest on my mom's birthday, May 12th. June ain't much better, as it represents my fathers birthday, June 1 and my brother's birthday June 21 and Father's day lays somewhere in that month. So be forwarn that I may be moody in June as well but I will try my best to keep a better grip.
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